We condemn your soul and fate [Never mind the possibilities]

[dudeimbatman]

[A list of morals]

*You don't screw with kids.

*You beat the hell out of anyone or anything who does.

*You don't hit women (unless they're possessed then all bets are off)

*You don't screw with Sammy (see the kid rule)

*You don't play Stairway to Heaven

*You don't talk about Mom

*You don't hurt my baby

[A list of Judgments People Make about Me]

*I'm stupid

*I'm always a jerk

*I'm always an ass

*I've got an STD of some kind

*I want to screw your girlfriend/wife/sister/daughter

*I'm crazy

*I screwed Bela Talbot (Oh hell no, I've got standards)

*I don't have things I want

*I want to get myself killed

*I'm (and I'm quoting Sammy here)"like a rat who pushes the pleasure button instead of the food button until I die"...Seriously? Dude, I eat.

*I can't possibly eat anymore

*I'm full of shit

*I'm the stronger brother

*I'd make it alright by myself

*I'm the rebellious one

*I'm just like Dad

*I'm gay...and with my brother no less. There are some sick people out there.

*That I only call Brooke for the phone sex. I can't help that it turns into that.

Comments

[dude-imbatman.livejournal.com]

Sometimes, on both counts.

The latter usually only when Sammy's out of the room or I'm locked in the bathroom.

[giveandforgive.livejournal.com]

Well, duh.

...Usually?

[dude-imbatman.livejournal.com]

Sometimes he's asleep with his earphones on.

[giveandforgive.livejournal.com]

You're not very nice to him sometimes.

[dude-imbatman.livejournal.com]

Sweetheart, I'm nice to Sam all the time.

[giveandforgive.livejournal.com]

Not when he's asleep.

[dude-imbatman.livejournal.com]

He doesn't know I'm not being nice to him so it doesn't count. I put the lotion back in my bag before he wakes up in the morning.

[giveandforgive.livejournal.com]

But if he knew he would think you're very mean to him.